197. No Love

The National Peace Corps Association posted a funny little blog post titled "12 Reasons to Date a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer”.  It has the top 12 reasons you should marry a returned Peace Corps volunteer, but, like usual, Eastern Europe volunteers are shown no love.

When people think about the Peace Corps they think Africa of some island where you live in a hut.  But Peace Corps in Moldova is different.  We may not have some of those physical difficulties but we do have difficulties (winter).  Also, Moldova is fairly developed in many ways, so our struggles are not teaching basic skills but trying to help Moldovans improve their processes, organizational management and networking.

So here is the top 12 list from and my reasons for why Moldova doesn’t fit into them:

1.     We can woo you in multiple languages. Who else is going to whisper sweet nothings to you in everything from Albanian to Hausa to Quechua to Xhosa? That’s right. Only a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer.
-This is true; we can woo in Romanian and Russian… and maybe even a form of Turkish or Ukrainian. 


2. We’re pretty good dancers. Yeah, we don’t like to brag, but after 27 months in Latin America or Africa we know how to move it.
-Moldovans do dance, but I don’t know if “the hora” makes us "better" dancers in the eyes of Americans.

3. We’ll eat anything. Seriously. No matter how bad your cooking, Returned Peace Corps Volunteers have had worse and will eat it with nary a blink. Sheep’s eyeball? Water buffalo gall bladder? Grasshoppers? Bush rat? Bring it.
-I guess this is true, but we do not eat too much that Americans would consider crazy.

4. We know all about safe sex, thanks to our very thorough Peace Corps health training. In fact, there’s a chance that we’ve stood unblushingly in front of hundreds of villagers and demonstrated good condom technique with a large wooden phallus.
-About 25% of volunteers in Moldova are health educators in Moldova, but I do not think anyone has done sex education in front of an entire village.

5. We’ll kill spiders for you. Well, actually, we’ll nonchalantly scoop them up and put them out of sight. Same goes for mice, geckos, frogs, snakes. Critters don’t faze Returned Volunteers.
-There is the occasional bug in our homes, but this isn’t a daily occurance.

6. We have great date ideas: wandering a street market, checking out a foreign film, taking in a world music concert, volunteering…. Romantic getaway? Our passport is updated and our suitcase is packed. With us, life is always an adventure.
-True

7. We like you for “you”… not your paycheck. Especially if we are freshly back from service, a local joint with “character” will win out over a pretentious eatery. Living in a group house? No problem. Does it have running hot water? What luxury!
-Generally true, but a lot of us having running water.

8. You won’t get lost when you’re with a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer. Navigating local markets on four continents, we’ve honed an uncanny sense of direction. Or else we’ll ask for directions. We’re not afraid to talk to “strangers.”
-True

9. Waiting for a late train or bus? Don’t worry, we’ve been there, done that. We can share lots of funny stories about “the bus ride from hell” that will make the time go quickly and put it all into perspective.
-True

10. Our low-maintenance fashion style. Returned Peace Corps Volunteer guys are secure in their manhood and don’t mind rocking a sarong. Women often prefer flip flops to high heels. We don’t spend hours in front of a mirror getting ready to go out.
-While it is true comfort is important for many Peace Corps Volunteers, Moldovans make sure they are dressed well before they leave the house. So many of us wear high heels, shine our shoes and make sure they we look presentable and fit in with the culture.

11. Marry us, and you won’t just get one family — you’ll get two! When we refer to our “brother” or “mom,” you’ll want to be certain we’re talking about our American one or our Peace Corps one. You might even get two wedding ceremonies, one in the U.S. and one back in our Peace Corps country.
-True, but I usually try to say 'mom' or 'host mom' to show the difference.

12. And last but not least, we aren’t afraid to get dirty.
-True. Cleanliness/appearance is important in Moldova, unless it is time to work in the fields..

So 7 of the 12 really fit Moldovan Peace Corps Volunteers.  The rest are more focused on volunteers in other parts of the world.

Leia Mais…

196. The Roles of Men and Women

I really enjoy talking with my host mom. We talk every day, we eat three meals a day together, but I really enjoy when we are cooking or doing something together that allows us to have a deep conversation. She is very interesting to talk to because she can explain the Orthodox Christian faith, she has visited America, and she lived in both Soviet and non-Soviet times in Moldova. All of those things and more makes her a very interesting person to talk with.

Our last major discussion was about the role of the sexes in America, Moldova and other countries. On that night she and I made lasagna together for dinner and were just talking after the meal. She was laughing about how her husband is pretty picky when it comes to food and that he likes the way and the kind of food his mother made and that is about it. She then said that he cannot really cook or clean because he was never required too when he was growing up.

My host mom has three sisters and one brother and they were raised so that there was no work that only one sex could do. If something had to be done around the house the no matter if the person was male of female, if he/she was available they did the work. Shen they got married she quickly realized that her husband had not grown up in this type of atmosphere. They celebrated their marriage in her village and then they came to live in her husband’s village. Her sister was in town and getting ready to leave, so my host mom was putting food on the table and asked her husband to help bring food from the kitchen and place it on the table so that they could all eat together quickly before her sister had to leave. When her mother-in-law heard her ask her new husband to help, my host mom was reprimanded by her mother-in-law because that “Is the work for a woman, not for men!”

I told her that America has people that think similarly. But she said, “No, when I was in America men would help with the children, they would carry them around and push them in strollers. Here you do not see that much, because it is the job of a woman.” She pointed out that the Moldovan mentality is changing, because there is TV, Internet and many women have traveled and lived in other countries and realize that life is not this way all over the globe.

Then we then talked about how she was in the hospital with a lady from Azerbaijan and even though it was summer, the lady had no skin showing. The lady said that when walking down the road she could not make eye contact with a man and that when her husband came home the children must have finished eating and been put to bed, she would serve him his dinner on a platter. My host mom’s point was that the way women are treated in Moldova could be worse, but she also recognizes that Moldovan’s mentality when it comes to women is and needs to continue changing and developing.

Leia Mais…

195. Heart Pains

Moldova is considered the poorest country in Europe. In my village I have heard that pension range from 50 to 200 US Dollars per month. Most Moldovans cannot live without canning and preserving fruits and vegetable form their own garden.

Due to salaries being low and work is hard to come by many Moldovans work abroad. In the village where I live there are parents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles and friends that live and work abroad. The most common countries where people my village are working are Romania, Ukraine, Russia, Italy and America.

There are children have grown up with their grandparents, only seeing their parent(s) on holidays and via webcam on a computer. Marriages and families have been destroyed due to people working abroad. Some people that work abroad send money back to support their family back home, visit when they can, and do their best to continue their relationship with their spouse and children. Others make new relationships in the countries where they have started working and never return home or support their family in Moldova.

The other day, I was using the internet at the local public computer lab and saw a scene that broke my heart. A man in his thirties brought his daughter and son to the computer lab. His children played different games on the computer while he used the program Skype to talk to his wife who is working in another country. I have seen this family before; I think they use the computer lab once a week to speak with their loved ones.

Even though I only heard one side of the conversation, it was heart wrenching. At one point the man ask his wife, “Will you come home this summer?” A few minutes later the father gave the headset to his daughter. The daughter talked a little bit, and then she asked in a barely understandable tear-stained voice, “Mommy, when are you coming home?”

At that point I wished I did not understand Romanian. My eyes filled with tears and I was thankful that my parents and siblings were always together while we were growing up.

Leia Mais…

194. Teach me more

My host family and I sat down to have dinner.  We ate fried rice that I made with my host mom.  This conversation happened during the meal:

Host Mom:  Team me more recipes, I really like this food.  It is simple and healthy, it has hardly any fat in it.
Host Dad:  Don't teach her any more recipes.  I am not tired of and like the food she normally makes.

I think my host dad will just have to deal with trying something new a few times a month.

Leia Mais…

193. Chisinau, A European Capitol

Check out this 20 minute documentary about the Capital of Moldova, Chisinau!

Leia Mais…